Al Malahim Media Institute
The Good Reminders Part 17:
“Civility of the Dispute Between the Mujahidin”
Sheikh Harith al Nithari
(may Allah protect him)
“Peace and Allah’s mercy and blessings be upon you. Praise be to Allah the Lord of the worlds. Prayers and peace be upon his prophet, his family, and all his followers. Therefore:
“When disputes and conflict come up, our reference should be the Quran and the Sunnah. Only knowledgeable people should make such calls, using these references. By knowledgeable people (al ulama’), we mean those who are trusted and straightforward in their character. Additionally, there are certain behaviors we need to follow during times of conflict.
One of the characteristics of a munafiq (hypocrite) is becoming obscene when he disagrees with a person, we ask Allah (swt) for his protection against hypocrisy. This should not be the situation with the believer. A believer is a pious person who speaks al haqq (the truth), whether in agreement or disagreement with another person. Therefore, there are certain behaviors we need to stick to when conflict strikes.
The first behavior is impartiality fi sabil Allah and not sticking tight to their personal opinions. Our main purpose should be to discern Allah’s (swt) ruling on the issue and to worship Him. Our focus should be on pleasing Allah (swt), whether a final ruling pleases us personally or not. Many times, the shari’a ruling may be against our desire, therefore, we must train ourselves to accept such a ruling in all matters.
The second behavior is kindness of speech during disagreement. Allah ta’ala said: ‘Speak fair to an Nass (the people).’ (From al Quran al Karim al Baqara 2:83). Imam al Qurtubi said about this verse: therefore, a person’s speech should be soft and his face should shine when talking with either a good or evil man, a Sunni or Mubtadi’i, without compromising or any inclination to condone the beliefs of the opponent. Allah (swt) said to Moses and Aaron: ‘Speak to him (the Pharoah) mildly.’ (from al Quran al Karim Ta Ha 20:44). Therefore, we declare the person who gives nasiha (advice) is not better than Moses and Aaron, and the person who receives the nasiha is not more evil than Pharoah. Talha bin Umar said to Ata bin Rabah: ‘The people meeting at your home have different leanings, and I am a hard-tempered man. I may answer to them in a harsh manner.’ So Talha responded and said: ‘Do not do that. Allah ta’ala said: ‘Speak fair to the people.’
The third behavior is giving the opponent the benefit of the doubt and thinking positively about what he said or did. Both al Haqq (truth) and falsehood are clear, but one may have an excuse for doing something wrong, so we must give that person the benefit of the doubt and act as his advocate before judging him.
The fourth behavior deals with not raising your voice during the time of the disagreement. This behavior needs focus and the right habits. Allah ta’ala said: ‘And be moderate in your pace, and lower your voice.’ (from al Quran al Karim Luqman 31:19). Then, he mentioned that a bad example about those who speak with a loud voice when He said in the same verse: ‘the harshest of sounds, without a doubt, is the braying of the ass.’ Raising the voice is not good manners. The truth is obvious by its evidence and the strength, so there is not a need to say it with a loud voice or with emotion. This behavior needs to be discussed, as one person may not be able to do this on multiple occasions at the beginning. Therefore, one needs to watch himself to practice this behavior.
The fifth behavior is acknowledging our differences in how we look at the issue. You should see your opponent’s viewpoint while you still disagree with it. You should think of it like a worthy opinion, but say your opinion may be better. Yousef al Sadafi said: ‘I have not seen any man wiser than Imam al Shafi’i. I discussed a matter with him and then we left each other. I saw him again, so he held my hand and said: ‘Abu Musa, can we not still be brothers even if we disagree on a matter?’ This shows the hikmah (wisdom) of this Imam, and how great his doctrine is, since to today, similar people have disagreements with each other.
These are five behaviors we should try to adhere to and commit ourselves to continuing. May Allah (swt) forgive us our trespasses and grant us mercy. Peace and Allah’s blessings be upon everyone.”
“Oh Aqsa, We are Coming!”